Trilogy Day Part 2: Ashopalypse next (They finally broke Oscar!)

So to recap; something about mutants and a post apocalypse and a happy birthday prophecy. If that doesn’t make sense then make sure that you go and read our previous post. The question is will mutant X survive; it’s down to the zoom audience…he does. Gotta give them something to vote for. The film starts off 2 weeks later; Steff, Jack and her mum are back in Greggs and Steff is acting very odd. Steff wants a bit of a spoon so that she can go to sleep, leading to poor Henry Lewis trying to get on to the small space and not knock her off in a very awkward spoon opening up a really weird love triangle.

Meanwhile Jordan and Sybil are arguing and flash back to when Sybil was a town planner and met Jordan to go on a fate. The lieutenant had been bitten by a mutant over a year ago, he hasn’t mutated but they are interrupted by Jordan accusing him of cheating and the new heart exploding.  Jack sees Steff again and they reminisce about what it was like to be on a high street; leading to a side comment from Lewis about Morrisons being crap and liking Morrisons. Steff bites Jack and turns him into a mutant for getting with her mother.

Mutant X returns from hiding in the book shop under a pile of book characters that send Oscar over the edge before the scene has even started. Lawrence Dillalio makes his entrance with lots of different book characters. Lawrence has a psychic link to Steffanie and want to take over the world with the other mutants, they sing the whole song “mutants” which I think might be the best song I have heard Shields sing. What is Steff going to get up to?

Steffanie tells Jolene that she needs to go before its too late and admits that she is a mutant. Finally they are all mutants after having a bit of a freak out in the camera. Jacks voice changes into a very crazy, stuck rhythm which sounds more like the daleks than mutants. They are out there to stop every single survivor and turn them into mutants.

Oscar cuts it to another scene where Jordan, lieutenant and Sybil are running up to the lab pointing out that they were they were meant to be going to see the women. Turns out Jordan was a haematologist and the lieutenants blood might be the one to stop the mutants and save them all. Before they get into other lab they need check in all their weapons which are coming from every crevice possible to the point where it was ridiculous and Oscar had to fast forward through the whole section and nearly broke Dave Hearn again. They will need to take all of the blood of the lieutenant in order to save everyone.

Steff appears through the wall to talk to her father and learns of the antidote and stops Jordan by turning him into a Mutant. This leaves only SYBIL who can’t remember who he is without the peacock umbrella penis and they pronounce they are going to go and shag in the umpire chair. This sends OSCAR to the point of screaming at the cast, screaming at the audience and the TV audience for applauding the hilarity and throws all the reason out of the window. How can Kershaw be left in charge of saving the whole stories and Oscar has a full-blown meltdown that there is a whole other hour of this to go!

The mutants go all over town converting the last remaining survivors as the only person left is Sybil with the vaccine. Andrew has given himself up and is found by Steff and Jolene who go to him before he dies. They turn back into humans and Mutant X reappears right at the end and capture Sybil who has the vaccine. He threatens to go into his trousers to get it but Jordan crushes the vaccine in his hand and makes the vaccine airborne. They seem to have turned into the Mitchell brothers instead of their original characters. This seems like the end of the movie but there is still one more to go. What will happen next? I have no bloody idea but I’m excited to find out.

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